We are all feeling types
One of the biggest misconceptions in personality typology is that the feeling function is about feelings.
Feeling is about feeling into what we perceive through our intuition or sensation, and then accepting or rejecting it. It is a rational process, like thinking, because it is about evaluating.
To make it even more confusing (or fun!), Jung said that extraverted feeling types can “sometimes be the coldest person on earth.” As Marie-Louise von Franz says in Lectures on Jung’s Typology: “people who have differentiated feeling are, in a hidden way, calculating.”
Introverted feeling types, per von Franz, are “difficult to understand…Feeling is very strong, but it does not flow towards the object. It is rather like being in a state of love with oneself.” She also compares it to the “flow of hot lava from a volcano” that moves very slowly “but it devastates everything in its way.”
There’s definitely an edge to being a feeling type!
Anyway, here is something I’ve been pondering lately: Since none of the four functions (intuition, sensation, thinking, and feeling) are directly about emotions themselves, how do we understand type in relation to emotions?
If we can reconcile the thinking/feeling polarity within each of us, that could help us develop what Chinese philosophy calls the “heart-mind.”
I recently learned about the heart-mind from The Path: What Chinese Philosophers Can Teach Us About the Good Life by Michael Puett. Chinese philosophy—especially Taoism—influenced Jung, so I was eager to read this book after hearing about how Puett’s classes are among the most popular at Harvard.
In Chinese, the word xin refers to both mind and heart. Those who cultivate their heart-mind are able to navigate life well, balancing reason and feeling. As Puett explains, wise decisions don’t come from intellect alone—they come from an integration of both mind and heart.
How can we develop this heart-mind?
Pay attention to your physical sensations during acts of kindness. That’s the “sprout of goodness” within you.
“In this way, you are not growing your goodness in the abstract: you are learning through every step of this process how to sow the conditions in which it can thrive,” according to Puett.
That’s easier said than done for those of us who aren’t sensation types and forget to pay attention to our bodies.
Think of yourself as a farmer. Rather that focusing on setting long term goals and five-year plans, you cultivate different parts of yourself:
You can’t plan out how everything in your life will play out. But you can think in terms of creating the conditions in which things will likely move in certain directions: the conditions that allow for the possibility of rich growth. By doing all this, you are not just being a farmer. You are also the results of the farmer’s work. You become the fruit of your labor.
That’s easier said than done for those of us who are intuitive types and like to begin with the end in mind.
Become aware of what triggers your emotions on a daily basis. Then strive to change them for the better.
What are the patterned habits, the entrenched narratives, through which you perceive the world? Does your partner’s criticizing you for the way you load the dishwasher trigger memories of your own childhood, when you were constantly made to feel inept? Do you tend to placate friends instead of being assertive because you feel unworthy of expressing a strong opinion?
Become more comfortable with ambiguity. When we let go of rigid expectations and don’t have “cherished outcomes,” what’s left is the heart-mind to guide us through life’s complexities.
Just like individuation isn’t a solo effort, cultivating the heart-mind isn’t only about inner balance—it’s about engaging more deeply with the world and others.
It teaches us that both feeling and thinking work best when they are aligned. Although some of us identify more strongly with the feeling function than others, the capacity for heart-mind wisdom resides in all of us.
_____________________
WHAT I OFFER:
Consultations:
Astrology Consultations and Tutoring
Writing:
Subscribe to the Reading in Depth monthly newsletter
Get blog posts for free by email or on Substack (also free)
Index to my popular blog posts about personality typology